Hello!

My name is Courtney and a year and a half ago I decided it was time to lose some weight and start to focus on my health. I was borderline obese according to my bmi and was sedentary. I was also going through a difficult time emotionally, and my weight was increasing steadily. So, in March 2014 I decided to join Weight Watchers and started exercising regularly. I got addicted to weight loss and was happy with how quickly I saw results. After 4 months I had lost 50 pounds and reached my goal weight. After 5 months I had lost close to 60 pounds and was below my goal weight.

Ultimately, I lost weight too quickly and reached a weight that was too low for my body frame and in August 2014 I started eating a little more and slowly starting gaining some weight back. However, I continued counting points and calories and exercising regularly. Over the past year I gained back about 20-25 pounds that I had lost. The weight came back on pretty fast, but some of that weight I needed to gain. Now I have reached a point where I'm ready to transition out of counting points and calories because it is now causing me too much stress and I don't like that I obsess over the numbers all day. I have also become tired of obsessing over the the number on the scale and basing my happiness on that number.

This past year has been tough for me and I have received a lot of different book recommendations to help me with my issues with emotional eating, body image, etc. One of the books that was recommended to me was "Intuitive Eating" and right away I related to everything the book was talking about. I have been slowly reading and studying this book and I'm trying to now practice the principles of Intuitive Eating in combination with the government's healthy guidelines for a balanced diet.

I struggle with bad body image and I'm not super confident at my current weight/size and as I try to navigate the waters of learning healthy habits, I'm also trying to find body acceptance and improve my self esteem.

 I have a lot of thoughts on these topics about the emotional aspects of weight loss, body image, the pressure from society to be thin, emotional eating, etc. I'd like to use this space to share my thoughts and reflections on building healthy habits through diet and exercise (no advice here since I do not have any nutrition or fitness knowledge, but just my thoughts on how things are going for me), the process that has led me to where I'm at now, the struggles I've faced and battled in the past year, and reflections on what has led to my history of disordered eating habits (yo-yo dieting, emotional eating, bingeing, and restricting). I will also probably share some daily lifestyle posts as well.

Today was the first day I officially stopped counting points and calories and I've felt better than I have in a long time. I might have to return to counting if I can't get a good control of healthy eating patterns, but for now I'm excited to make some changes and try to create a more relaxed lifestyle for myself that is healthy, but not obsessive. I am not striving for perfection here. Welcome to my wellness journey. :)